Why Is Ignorance A Celebrated Parenting Style?

A friend the other day frowned at the idea of me wanting to teach my son French and music (among a million other things). She says what everyone often says, not to “force” children to do something they don’t like.

You know what else children don’t like? Math & literacy. Yet it is a requirement in any school around the world. I’m sure children generally prefer to have all day recesses with their buddies and have unlimited access to ice cream and chips. But we don’t, because we know this is a critical time in human development to learn. (having fun is important too, but not 24/7 obviously)

Why can’t parents go above and beyond the expectations of the basic school curriculum to teach their children valuable skills?

Music

We teach children to recognize shapes, colours and their names. We teach children the names of tastes (salty, sweet), how something feels (hot, cold, soft, hard), but for some reason, when it comes to our hearing senses, it is pushed to the side. We don’t teach babies the sound of pitches and their names. This is sad because music and sound is the most powerful of the senses. Once you are three and haven’t learned the pitches, your brain will permanently shut off its ability to learn (unless you are blessed with rare perfect pitch genetics).

Why not give your child the gift of being able to read any sheet music and hear it in their minds as music? Why not give your child the gift of being able to write music on paper accurately as they hear it in their minds without the aid of instruments? Or giving your child the ability to express themselves through singing?

Just because we teach kids music doesn’t mean we want them to sign on to a big label or win music competitions. We should teach kids music the same reason we teach them grammar, spelling and art which is to give them another medium to express themselves in.

This is why I bought an app called Nuryl, which is a playlist of “high information” music curated by a man who has a son with a level of perfect pitch I have never seen in my life. (see video below). I am also playing music often everyday and have plenty of fun activities planned ahead!

 
 

French (and other “useless” languages)

English is pretty much the language of Earth right now, and Spanish & Mandarin are up there. So when I told my friend that I will be teaching (talking to) my son in French (and some Farsi), she was like, “why not Spanish?”.

“Yes that too!” (I live in a very hispanic part of the country).

Why can’t I give my son all the knowledge I know and more in languages? We all know that its next to impossible to learn a new language at the native speaker level as adults, so why not give him as much of these abilities as possible? Being able to speak another language (especially at the native speaker level) means more opportunities for jobs, travelling and meeting interesting people. You also learn another culture and another way of thinking. Again, much like music, language mastery at the native level is a skill you can only learn as a baby.

So yea, I dropped like $500 in French books and memorized a lot of songs to sing to my son.

Conclusion

So teaching your kid music and french among other skills is not about “forcing” your kid to “achieve” something. This is about giving your children “options” so they are “empowered” to do “whatever THEY want”.

Very happy to be married to a man who shares my values especially when it comes to learning! And it doesn’t hurt that he is extremely knowledgeable too in so many things I don’t know! Oh and he supports me wanting to homeschool our son because we all know how much school can waste time and is not up to date among other problems! This will be talked about in another post!

Yes, I am Actually Happy With The Wild Child

Yes, my baby is kicking up a storm in utero to the point that it really hurts, with the skin stretching and all. I did some googling to see if this is any indication of his personality. No science to back it up, but a lot of personal experiences documented on forums tell me it does. Wild fetus = Wild child. Sadly, these soon-to-be-parents mention how they are “afraid” of an energetic child. This angers me! They should be excited to have an energetic child, and if they don’t have an energetic child, they should do everything it takes to encourage being energetic.

Do these parents care about having a child that is going to grow up to be strong, independent and successful? An energetic person is someone who is physically active, speaks up for themselves and won’t give up. I want the kid who talks back to me, play all day and explores.

But sadly, these selfish parents seem to want the meek, subservient, pushover types because they just care about making their own lives easier and nothing else really. Yet these children are punished by the same parents when they don’t succeed in school or in the real world which require the opposite characteristics. They want to put in as minimal effort as possible in child rearing. The “easier” it is to raise the child, the “better” this “good” kid will be. The more mute, lifeless and agreeable, the better. These are not the parents that have any interest in their children’s future. So then why do they bother having kids? These are the lazy selfish parents that just want to use their kids as an accessory for compliments on social media. Or they probably have some disney 1950’s vision of what a family should be like. Or they had the kids by accident and try to sustain an easy life for themselves. They are probably the parents whose first choice is to throw their kids in front of a tv to get them out of their hair rather than making them participate in sports and other extra curricular activities.

I’m not entirely sure all the purposes people have for parenting. In my view, parenting should only be about doing what’s best for your children and their future. Anything else is foolish and evil.

Transitioning Off Facebook Thoughts

My husband wonders why I don’t share our personal life on Facebook. But I point out that I also don’t even post my birthday or any personal milestones there. I am just not comfortable with sharing personal information with acquaintances (and expired friends) who are not soliciting for them (nor would I want to share with necessarily). Also, I am not interested in unsolicited useless information from them.  I unfollowed pretty much everyone. My brain has no benefit to register their life details. I took control of my newsfeed so I can see updates from the groups, places and pages that I should care about. The only personal information updates I am actually concerned about is my direct family and a few friends. And that’s my limit, and I think maybe once a day of that info is more than enough.

Also, the brain could benefit with some focus. Being inundated with constant tidbits about different things can’t be good. What can I achieve when I am scrolling through streams of other people’s consciousness, random pictures, announcements of other people’s accomplishments, etc? It’s good to dedicate your day to two or three things (family, work & fitness, maybe even real fun!). Your thoughts will be deeper, your imagination will be more vivid, you will be much happier, these are just some things that happened to me when I stopped using it.

There are other ways of archiving your life and you can use Facebook for other purposes. Sometimes I use it as a place where I share information I think that could better the world. Or I share positive things I did that I want other people to follow. For example, I planted fruit trees in my local public park so that the community has a constant supply of some free food! I also talked about planting milkweeds and all the endangered Monarch Butterflies being attracted to it.

I think it’s best to archive my life with travel photos, fun pictures, thoughts & milestones here on my website! My way!

Choosing A Child’s Name

I thought this would be easy, I had the perfect girl’s name, but I do not have the perfect boy’s name. And guess what I am having? Yea.

It has to be two syllables, at most three. Easy to pronounce. A nice ring. A strong presence. Very unique. I don’t want hundreds of people to have the same name (since his last name will be common). Also, I don’t want the name to be associated with any culture (nor any religion!). This has to be the name of a brighter future! So I thought about using scientific names, like Argon or Radon. My husband is against this of course. I’m also trying to invent a new sounding name, but unfortunately nothing unique is coming up, they are all taken! So let me know if you have something!