I feel like I have been told in every life situation to be tough with the EXCEPTION of motherhood.
How is it that suddenly I am hearing on every mom website and person to “take a break”, “self-care” and all that? This is such a foreign concept suddenly!
It starts in school where you spend all day there, eat a cold packed meal (because you are too stupid to be trusted with using a mini oven), and spend hours doing homework, and be super stressed and scared about exams because, as the message goes, this is your only chance at life to shine, if you mess up, your future is bleak, you will be poor and homeless! And if you are like most people, you should do this while being poor.
And if you are an older kid, at 16, you should be tough enough to do a part-time job that gives you a measly 15 minute break after 5 hours or so. If you are in retail, you have to stand up the whole time with your legs hurting. If you are telemarketing, you get headaches from all the verbal harassment. And you are probably commuting to this job two hours total in a bus.
And then you probably get a sketchy “real job” that earns you money all right but you know is a big waste of time and is not contributing to society (think insurance, agents, etc). And you are expected to be there 8 hours a day everyday with only 10 days of vacation a year and some statutory holidays!
But suddenly, when you are a mom, you hear the message everywhere: “TAKE A BREAK”, “SELF CARE!” This is actually the time when you are supposed to exert your energy the most. But society tells you that this energy should be dedicated to school and work, not your children!
So how do we summarize this message? The customer is always right, the customer is king, but when you have a kid who is vulnerable to you, it is okay to put yourself first?
Well I have exerted a lot of energy but I will not stop now!